Episode Transcript
[00:00:12] The Tree of Life Project Using Narrative Ideas in Work with Vulnerable Children in Southern Africa by Ncazelo Ncube, Read by Ncazelo Ncube.
[00:00:29] At the time of writing this article, Ncazelo was working for REPSSI, a regional psychosocial support organization working in east and southern Africa to support vulnerable children.
[00:00:50] At this time in 2026, Ncazelo is working for Paula, an organization that she founded in 2016 to respond to trauma and related hardships faced by children and young people, families, communities, and different populations and groups that are experiencing harm hard times in South Africa.
[00:01:21] This paper describes the use of narrative ideas in work with children in Southern Africa.
[00:01:30] How can the lives of children who have experienced significant losses be responded to in ways that are not re traumatizing and that bring to light children's own skills and knowledge?
[00:01:46] What sorts of exercises can be used in camps for vulnerable children?
[00:01:53] How can children be provided with significant experiences that do not separate them from their families, values, and cultural norms?
[00:02:04] This paper describes a creative adaptation of the Tree of Life exercise informed by narrative therapy principles and practices.
[00:02:18] Introduction I have been working with orphans and vulnerable children for at least six years now.
[00:02:27] Anyone working in this field in southern Africa will have many heartbreaking stories to tell about the hopelessness and desperate situations of illness, parental death, and the subsequent suffering of millions of children who are faced with the reality of living their lives without their parents.
[00:02:50] HIV and AIDS has robbed numerous families of their joy and zeal to live fulfilled lives.
[00:02:58] I have worked as a child and community counselor as well as a trainer for a number of organizations within Southern and East Africa whose purpose is to support the most vulnerable children, families, and communities falling through the traditional safety nets. In this work, I have found myself not only having to grapple with helping vulnerable children and communities, but also being overwhelmed by expressions of burnout, defeat struggles, and feelings of incompetence often expressed by practitioners working in this field.
[00:03:44] This sense of incompetence has been further complicated by our struggles to identify suitable tools, means, and methods that enable us to effectively counsel and provide support to children and their families in ways that are fulfilling to them and ourselves as helpers.
[00:04:10] I have always been confronted with questions about how practitioners in the field should respond to the crying and wailing that they often experience when having conversations with children and communities about their losses.
[00:04:30] I found myself struggling to come up with satisfactory answers and ideas to such questions.
[00:04:38] My colleagues and I have often spoken about our experiences of defeat and incompetence, particularly when faced with such challenges and dilemmas.
[00:04:52] It is not easy to deal with a sense of failing individuals who, you know, have faced significant struggles in their lives and who have come to seek support from you.
[00:05:08] I have, however, come to realize that a lot of the struggles and limitations that we experience in our work are linked to structural approaches to counseling that often trap practitioners and people seeking counseling services into problem saturated accounts of life.
[00:05:32] Such accounts often leave both the people seeking help and the counselors feeling drained.
[00:05:41] For individuals seeking counseling support, they find themselves trapped in the territories of life that made them to seek counseling in the first place.
[00:05:53] Looking at the work that we have been doing with bereaved children and communities, I now realize that part of our problem was basing our practices on the Western notions of catharsis.
[00:06:09] Some of our work is has been informed by ideas that bereaved children and communities are not given platforms to express their grief and therefore have feelings and emotions trapped deep inside them which need to be vented out.
[00:06:28] This kind of thinking has been very dominant in our work.
[00:06:33] We have for a long time seen ourselves and as playing a role in providing the space for trapped feelings and emotions to come to the surface.
[00:06:46] The reality of such expressions, however, has been clearly overwhelming for both the individuals that seek our help and the counselors providing support services.
[00:07:01] This paper documents a way of working with children using the Tree of Life tool which we have adapted through our engagement with narrative ideas.
[00:07:15] Before I describe this, however, it may be helpful for me to provide some background information about the work of Mercea Camp which is where we will be using this new way of working.
[00:07:31] Masiye Camp Masiye Camp is a Christian based organization in Zimbabwe that focuses on life skills development for orphans and vulnerable children.
[00:07:46] Children who attend the Life skills camps are identified from various communities and referred to Masiye Camp by different community based initiatives all around Zimbabwe and even beyond the borders.
[00:08:03] What has made Masiye Camp a unique initiative has been the involvement and participation of young people in providing counseling services to their peers.
[00:08:15] Masiye Camp's dream was from its conception to enhance the coping capacity of children affected by HIV and AIDS and other emergency situations.
[00:08:29] Furthermore, Masiye's vision has been to provide opportunities for disadvantaged children to develop life skills and experience equal opportunities in the social world.
[00:08:44] The majority of young people who serve as camp counselors have experienced significant losses themselves.
[00:08:53] They are keen to provide support to their peers through sharing their own personal experiences and journeys as orphans. The peer to peer support takes place largely through group therapy. An average camp has the capacity to take at least 50 children in a given time and runs for about 10 days.
[00:09:19] Children attend the camps in different age groups 6 to 11, 12 to 16 and 17 plus including child headed households. Masiye's work has been shared and emulated by several organizations working with vulnerable children in east and Southern Africa.
[00:09:47] A summary of some of the Achievements of Masiye Camp Masiye Camp provides place and opportunities for children to talk about their personal realities and experiences in the context of HIV and aids.
[00:10:05] This is not usually possible in their families and communities due to cultural beliefs and practices that inhibit communicating with children on difficult issues such as death and HIV and aids.
[00:10:22] Such topics are usually viewed to be taboo.
[00:10:27] Children are provided with opportunities to share problems with their peers and learn coping skills from each other. The camp is a place where new relationships and good memories and are formed.
[00:10:43] Masiye Camp provides children with a rare opportunity for fun and play that is not always possible in communities where most children have to deal with taking care of ill parents and have numerous household responsibilities.
[00:11:03] The camp program is designed in such a way that that children have opportunities to receive career guidance, practical lessons on day to day living such as the art of budgeting, first aid, development of skills in arts, and so on. Masiye is committed to breaking the silence around HIV and AIDS and focusing on loss and bereavement, especially in the lives of children.
[00:11:37] This makes it a unique initiative as these issues are usually seen as not important in children's lives.
[00:11:47] Young people in the Masiye Camp program are seen as active agents of change in their lives and their communities.
[00:11:57] Children experience life skills development through play and outdoor experiential learning activities.
[00:12:06] Support is also provided to children who are heading households.
[00:12:12] Children who come to the camps are linked to support services such as legal services, medical treatment and food security initiatives.
[00:12:25] Dilemmas and Challenges the children who attend the camps are often struggling with the effects of loss and bereavement, abuse and neglect, family breakdown, and extreme poverty.
[00:12:42] Involving young people in offering peer to peer support has made many things possible, but it has also raised a number of challenges and dilemmas.
[00:12:53] The young people involved in offering counseling services to their peers have experienced significant losses themselves.
[00:13:02] If camp counselors have to continually revisit loss and listen to painful stories, their involvement in camps can be re traumatizing to them.
[00:13:15] We have noted with concern how young people who have been through the camp and who are then viewed as role models are often unable to sustain preferred ways of living.
[00:13:30] We have observed young camp counselors struggling with alcoholism, prostitution, poor planning, and having difficulty in taking steps to shape their lives and their future.
[00:13:47] Many of the children who come to camp are in conflict with their families and struggle to fit in when they go back home after the camp. Experiences our programs that work with children outside the context of their families and communities having the effect of alienating children from their families and communities?
[00:14:13] If this is a possibility, the question to ask is how can children be effectively supported without separating them from their families, values, and cultural norms?
[00:14:28] How can such a camp experience go beyond just having a good time but also meaningfully assist children to take steps in shaping their lives and future?
[00:14:42] How can the camp program ensure that the diverse experiences and personal desires of children in a group context are catered for?
[00:14:54] How can community ownership of programs be achieved?
[00:15:00] Currently, the larger responsibility for orphans and vulnerable children's programs seems to rest upon organizations and is not linked back to local communities as it could be in most of our communities. There is a strong belief that young children are passive recipients of life and are not affected by issues of death.
[00:15:28] Our experience has differed. How can narrative practices enhance the work we do with children?
[00:15:36] Because the program works with a lot of children at any given time, we feel that group approaches are critical.
[00:15:46] We would like to explore how we can use narrative ideas in working with children in groups.
[00:15:55] The Tree of Life at Masiye Camp One of the key tools that we have been using in our work with children at Mesilla Camp has been the Tree of Life.
[00:16:08] I introduced this tool to mesilla camp in 2003 during a training program that was run at the camp for practitioners who are involved in the care and support of children affected by HIV and AIDS in east and Southern Africa.
[00:16:27] I had been introduced to the Tree of Life by a colleague and friend, Jonathan Brakarsh, and we had used it to learn from the children about the kinds of concerns they had about their lives during times of change such as HIV and aids.
[00:16:47] In this exercise, we would invite children to draw their Tree of Life with particular attention paid to the following themes.
[00:16:57] Roots Children were invited to think about and write on their Tree of Life significant figures from the ancestry, origins, and family history.
[00:17:09] Trunk the trunk of the tree was a prompt for children to draw representations of significant events that had shaped their lives.
[00:17:21] These were either positive events or events that could be regarded as difficult or that evoked a painful memory.
[00:17:32] Leaves the leaves of the tree represented important people or significant relationships in an individual's lives.
[00:17:42] At Masiye Camp, we introduced the metaphor of fallen leaves and to represent people who had been lost to the child, such as parents who had died.
[00:17:55] Branches the branches of the tree were a prompt Elicit the child's thoughts, ideas, and wishes about the direction which he or she would like to go in life.
[00:18:09] Fruits the fruits stood for the achievements that the child had accomplished in his or her life, the things that he or she was proud of.
[00:18:22] Buds the buds of the tree which could sometimes eat part of the fruit and destroy the leaves, were designed to represent the problems and challenges that children were facing in their day to day lives.
[00:18:40] Children were introduced to each of these metaphors as they drew their own Tree of Life.
[00:18:47] Once children had completed their drawing, they then presented it in front of the other children.
[00:18:55] Sometimes the camp counselors would ask questions to draw out each of these themes.
[00:19:04] I was quite drawn to the Tree of Life exercise for various reasons.
[00:19:11] The children who were initially introduced to the exercise became quite engaged in thinking through and reflecting about their lives. The Tree of Life seemed to engage all children and because it does not rely on spoken word, all children, even those who were shy, were able to come up with stories and rich descriptions about their lives.
[00:19:38] It made storytelling possible and the children seemed to be proud about various aspects of their stories like their roots, their origins and ancestry, and their achievements as expressed through the fruits of their trees.
[00:19:57] The Tree of Life brought out the creative abilities of children.
[00:20:02] It was a fun experience and the children enjoyed drawing.
[00:20:08] I felt educated about children's lives and their experiences without putting in too much effort.
[00:20:16] The children were also able to talk about the difficulties that they'd experienced in their lives.
[00:20:23] For these reasons, I encouraged Masiye Camp and other organizations to use the Tree of Life in their work with children.
[00:20:32] Masiye Camp has been using the tool for well over a year now. They've expressed that they prefer it much more than the retelling of grief and lost stories that had been a common feature of the bereavement work that was done with children during previous life skills camps. Such storytelling often led to a lot of crying and wailing and changed the fun mood of the camp into a gloomy morning atmosphere.
[00:21:03] Camp counselors expressed a sense of being overwhelmed by the sad stories that they heard from the children.
[00:21:11] The Tree of Life was was preferred in that it evoked positive elements of children's lives.
[00:21:19] It did, however, still lead to children to speak about said elements such as bugs, problems, and fallen leaves, that is People who have died.
[00:21:32] Children would often be distressed when talking about the bugs and the fallen leaves. The chem counselors were not sure how to respond to children when they began to express intense grief, introducing narrative ideas into the Tree of life.
[00:21:52] In November 2005, a team from Dulwich Center, Michael White, Cheryl White, Shona Russell, and David Denborough visited Masiye Camp for one week.
[00:22:04] We had specifically invited the Dulwich team to explore with us ways of responding to children who had experienced significant trauma and loss. During the week, many discussions took place about considerations of safety in conversations with children.
[00:22:23] In the course of our conversations, I became very interested in our role and responsibility as counsellors and to ensure that our practices enable children who consult us to have a safe place to stand, a place that allows them to experience a preferred identity in order to change their relationships with the problems and challenges that they are facing in their lives.
[00:22:50] From the discussions that week, I realized more and more how retraumatizing it can be for people to simply tell and retell a single storied account of loss or trauma. As these single storied accounts result in people dwelling only in the problem saturated territories of their identity. The Dulwich team had an opportunity to sit and witness the group work that was being done with children using the Tree of Life metaphor.
[00:23:23] After the experience, the Dulwich team expressed considerable appreciation for the work and commitment of the young camp counselors and particularly their willingness to share their own stories with the campers in their groups. We then discussed ways in which the Tree of Life exercise could be made more effective as a means of enabling children to to develop a second story about their lives and ensure that they had a safe territory of identity in which to stand before speaking about difficulties in their lives.
[00:24:03] I will now focus on how we have incorporated narrative ideas within the Tree of Life tool so that it enables a safe place for children to stand in relation to the problems and challenges that that they face in their lives.
[00:24:21] Tree of Life to provide a safe place for children to stand Roots of the Tree the roots of the Tree are a prompt for children to speak about where they come from, their village, town, country, their family history, origins, family name, ancestry, extended family, those who have taught the child the most in life, their favorite place at home, and a treasured song or dance.
[00:24:58] The Ground the ground represents where the child lives at present and some of the activities that the child is engaged in during their regular daily life.
[00:25:13] The Trunk of the Tree when the focus turns to the trunk of the tree, this is an opportunity for children to speak about and represent in drawing some of their skills. These include skills that may have become apparent when the child was talking about what they do in their daily lives or skills that the child has demonstrated during the camp or support group in the days leading up to the Tree of Life exercise, the counselors working with the children note different skills that children display. These might include skills in physical acts, skills of caring, kindness, and so on.
[00:26:00] During the Tree of Life exercise, the counselors can then draw attention to how the child has demonstrated these skills and can assist the child to include these on the trunk of their tree.
[00:26:16] During this process, counselors can also ask questions about the histories of these skills, how long the child has had them, and did they learn these these skills from anyone in particular?
[00:26:31] This enables stories to be told about these skills and the information from these stories can be recorded on the tree.
[00:26:41] While drawing the trunk, discussions also take place about special memories that the child can recall in his or her life.
[00:26:52] These are valuable memories that the child holds. Precious Branches of the Tree the branches of the tree represent the hopes and dreams and wishes that the child has for the direction of their life.
[00:27:10] While the child is drawing the branches, camp counselors can ask questions to learn about the history of these hopes and dreams and wishes and how these may be linked to significant people back in the child's home.
[00:27:27] When the counselors get to hear about how these hopes and dreams have been alive in the child's life, they may also ask about how the child has managed to hold on to these dreams and what has sustained their hopes.
[00:27:44] Leaves of the Tree the leaves of the tree represent people who are important to the child.
[00:27:52] The counsellor makes it clear that these can be people who may be alive or may have passed on.
[00:28:00] Just because people are no longer alive, it does not mean they are not still very important to us.
[00:28:07] Counselors may ask children questions about why these particular people are the most special to them. If at any time during this process, children talk about some people who have died and they are upset about this, the counselors can ask the following questions. Did you have lovely times with this person?
[00:28:31] What was special about this person to you?
[00:28:35] Would this person like it that you remember them in these ways?
[00:28:41] These questions invite the child to tell stories about what was significant about their relationship with the person who has died. This can contribute to an honoring of this relationship.
[00:28:56] It may also lead to some stories about how the child continues to think about and remember those who have passed away.
[00:29:07] Fruits the fruits of the tree represent gifts that the child has been given.
[00:29:14] These do not have to be material gifts, but could be acts of kindness or care or love from others.
[00:29:24] At this time, the counselors may ask, why do you think the person gave you this?
[00:29:33] What did they appreciate about you that would have led them to do this?
[00:29:40] What do you think you might have contributed to their life?
[00:29:45] If the child has difficulty in identifying any gifts, the camp counselors can draw upon the conversations that have been shared with the child. Elia in the Tree of Life Exercise this new version of the Tree of Life exercise was developed to be used as the first step in a four part process.
[00:30:09] The four part process was suggested by Devin Denbrough after he had witnessed the work of camp counselors during the Dulwich center team's visit to Mesilla Camp.
[00:30:22] Later in the paper, I will outline the further three steps.
[00:30:27] Now though, I will discuss how we have applied this new version of the Tree of Life in Soweto Jabavu in South Africa.
[00:30:39] Soweto Jabavu Having been given the task by colleagues to try out the suggested new version of the Tree of Life exercise, I traveled back to South Africa and sent out to work with children who attend structured bereavement group therapy sessions at Jabavu Clinic in Soweto. Hope Worldwide runs these groups for children between the ages of 6 to 18 years and occasionally also organizes life skills camps for orphans and vulnerable children using the Mesilla camp methodology.
[00:31:18] Out of a group of about 43 children were excited to spend the day with me. I decided I'll try out the exercise with a maximum of 22 of them. I was assisted to carry out the exercise by two counselors who usually conduct the support group meetings.
[00:31:40] Before we began, I consulted the two counselors about any concerns they had about their work with the children. In this context, they mentioned the following issues.
[00:31:55] The counselors expressed that they were aware that children enjoyed coming to support groups, but they were not sure if they were providing effective and sustainable support to the children, especially in assisting them to cope with parental loss and moving on with their lives.
[00:32:17] They also mentioned that they were some children who had been attending the group sessions for quite a while now over a year, but they were concerned that these children did not seem to be responding to the therapy.
[00:32:35] Special reference was made to an 11 year old boy who had lost both his parents and was now living alone with his seven year old brother in a child headed household. They also particularly drew my attention to a 10 year old girl who was abandoned by her mother as a baby and had been placed under the care of her aged grandparents.
[00:33:02] These two children were specially invited to take part in the revised Tree of Life exercise.
[00:33:10] The counselors also had a concern that they were running out of ideas about how to work with children.
[00:33:18] They spoke about their hopes for more tools and ideas that would ensure that the children attending support groups benefited from the meetings.
[00:33:30] Finally, the counsellors drew my attention to to the multiplicity of problems and challenges faced by the children in their day to day lives.
[00:33:41] They spoke of how it was difficult to know how to respond to these issues.
[00:33:48] Having listened to the concern raised by the counselors, I took time to explain the idea around the revised Tree of Life exercise with particular reference to issues of safety and second story development.
[00:34:06] One of the counselors described that in most situations they are aware and concerned about the physical safety and they appreciate this attention to emotional safety. I explained in detail the metaphor of the roots, ground, trunk, branches, leaves and fruits and invited the counselors to co facilitate the exercise.
[00:34:34] The counselors were greatly excited about this possibility.
[00:34:39] They were particularly drawn to the ideas of enabling children to have a different territory of identity in which to stand in relation to the problems that that they experienced in their day to day lives.
[00:34:55] Working with the Children on the Tree of Life and so we began.
[00:35:02] As I mentioned earlier, the process consists of four parts.
[00:35:08] Part 1 Tree of Life Part 2 Forest of Life Part 3 When the Storms Come Part 4 Certificate and Song Part 1 Tree of Life the aim of the first two parts of this process, Tree of Life and Forest of Life, is to build and acknowledge a second story about each child's life.
[00:35:39] This second story consists of skills, abilities, hopes and dreams of each child and the histories of these.
[00:35:49] I began the meeting with a brief discussion about trees in general.
[00:35:54] The children energetically talked about the kind of trees that they know and see in their communities.
[00:36:03] I then explained that we would spend the day together talking about our lives and experiences and assisted by our knowledge of trees.
[00:36:13] At this point, the children were quite excited.
[00:36:17] I then asked them to come up with a song to show me that just as trees are alive and give life, so do they as children.
[00:36:29] The musicians in the group quickly came up with a song that was sang and danced to.
[00:36:37] After the hectic dancing and singing, it was time to start the exercise.
[00:36:43] I presented the Tree of Life metaphor to them and explained its various parts.
[00:36:50] I then presented my own Tree of Life.
[00:36:53] The children listened with fascination and intrigue as I told my story.
[00:36:59] After I had completed my presentation, I asked the group of children who among them was keen to draw their tree of life.
[00:37:11] 22 hands went up.
[00:37:14] This represented one hand for every child in the room, including those who often struggled to participate in larger group activities.
[00:37:25] As the children drew their trees and developed their stories, it was quiet in the room, but there was also a sense of energy and concentration.
[00:37:38] Retelling when the children had finished drawing their trees, I invited them to stick them up on one of the walls.
[00:37:48] This created a forest of beautiful trees.
[00:37:52] We then called for a few volunteers to share the stories of their trees in front of the group.
[00:38:01] Several hands went up again in response to this invitation.
[00:38:07] The enthusiasm that the children were demonstrating spoke volumes to me.
[00:38:13] Usually in group counseling processes, it is a struggle to get children to speak out and share their experiences with one another.
[00:38:23] Understandably, sharing painful stories filled with guilt and shame is not as exciting as talking about the things that give one a sense of pride. The willing volunteers that came to the front to tell the stories of their trees were happy to share these.
[00:38:43] They were also happy to teach the group their favorite songs.
[00:38:50] As each child spoke, we were educated about their hopes and dreams.
[00:38:56] Throughout the presentations, I asked various questions about the history of the hopes and dreams that were expressed, how the children had managed to hold on to these hopes and dreams, and who else in their families and lives would know or would have known about these hopes and dreams.
[00:39:19] In response to these questions, we listened to heartwarming replies.
[00:39:24] I have included an extract of one such conversation here with mary, who was 12 years old.
[00:39:34] Interviewer thank you, Mary, for sharing with us the hopes and dreams that that you have for your life. I have learned that you want to study hard and grow up so that you can start your own business.
[00:39:50] As the eldest in the family, you want to be able to take care of your younger brothers and sisters so that they can also make it in life.
[00:40:01] You also hope to get married and have children.
[00:40:04] Marry I find myself quite drawn to the hopes and dreams that you mention.
[00:40:12] Can you tell me how long you've had these hopes and dreams and what influenced or brought them up?
[00:40:20] Mary My mother always encouraged us to work hard at school so that we could have good lives.
[00:40:30] Before she died in December 2003, she told us to always take care of each other.
[00:40:38] That is why I want to take care of my brothers, Anthony and Joshua.
[00:40:46] Interviewer so would you say your dreams and hopes for your life are linked to what your mother wanted for you?
[00:40:56] Mary I guess I have not thought about it like that before.
[00:41:03] Yes, I want to make sure I do well in life.
[00:41:09] My mother was a Christian. She taught us a lot of good things.
[00:41:15] Interviewer it sounds like you treasure the things that your mother taught and told you. Is that so?
[00:41:25] Mary yes, very much.
[00:41:30] Interviewer do you mind telling me, Mary, how you have managed to hold on to these hopes and dreams?
[00:41:39] How do you manage to keep them alive.
[00:41:44] MARY My mother left us a special memory book where she wrote down a lot of her thoughts and wishes for us.
[00:41:56] I sometimes take the book and read it to my brothers and it reminds us of our mother and what we need to do to live a good life.
[00:42:09] Some people say I think a lot.
[00:42:12] I think that helps me not to forget important things.
[00:42:18] Interviewer Is it okay that I'm asking you all these questions? MARY and then. MARY yeah, it's okay because it gets me thinking about important things that I have not thought about before.
[00:42:37] Interviewer Such as?
[00:42:40] Mary My mother and the important things she taught us.
[00:42:48] Interviewer Mary, who else in your family or in your life knows of these hopes and dreams that you have spoken of?
[00:43:02] MARY Chuckling, she points at her friend sitting across the room. Mevis knows because we talk and share a lot together.
[00:43:15] Interviewer what does it mean to you, Mary, to be talking about your hopes and dreams in these ways?
[00:43:24] MARY it makes me happy because I have had a chance to remember my mother and whenever I talk about her I feel happy.
[00:43:36] It also helps me to stick to what I want to achieve in my life.
[00:43:41] It is not easy to do that because sometimes you have bad friends who want to teach you wrong things and life is sometimes hard.
[00:43:52] So this is quite good for me to remember.
[00:43:57] There was a sense of quiet and fascination among the children during this brief conversation with Mary.
[00:44:04] You could almost feel and touch different thoughts floating around the room.
[00:44:10] After my conversation with Mary, I continued to invite other children to share their trees of life.
[00:44:18] When the children finished talking about their trees, I asked them all to come forward and write something positive that they had heard about their friends and peers when they presented their tree. This was a fun activity.
[00:44:35] A lot of encouraging words were passed and shared among the children.
[00:44:41] When I asked a few of the children how they felt about what was expressed, the children offered sentiments such as it makes me happy.
[00:44:52] I feel, wow.
[00:44:54] I have never thought that about myself.
[00:44:57] It encourages me.
[00:44:59] I feel happy that I have friends.
[00:45:04] Part 2 Forest of Life with the Trees of Life stuck up next to each other, we took some time to reflect on this forest of beautiful trees of all shapes and sizes.
[00:45:20] We sat down together to appreciate our forest.
[00:45:24] At this point, I offered a retelling to draw attention to the strong and firm roots that we all seem to have.
[00:45:34] I also mentioned the dreams and hopes that we had for our lives.
[00:45:39] I spoke of the people we are connected to who have taught us a lot of things in our lives and and continue to take care and support us in different ways.
[00:45:52] I gave examples of some of the people who had been mentioned by children, including parents, friends, pastors from church, our community counselors, social workers, teachers, grandparents, siblings, and other relatives. During this retelling, I also acknowledged that some of these precious people have died, but we still hold them in loving memory for the many wonderful things that they did for us.
[00:46:23] I spoke of how the relationships that we shared with them still support us in many ways as we continue to live our lives.
[00:46:34] After my retelling, we then spoke together about trees in a forest. We discussed about what trees may have in common and also some of the differences that they have.
[00:46:49] This led to a conversation about some of the things the children in the group and the adults in the group have in common and the way in which we support each other as trees belonging in the same forest.
[00:47:07] At this point, the mood among the children was very light, warm, and friendly.
[00:47:13] There was a lot of shared laughter.
[00:47:17] We then took a short break before we continued with the exercise.
[00:47:24] Part 3 When the storms Come Having established a different place for children to stand on, we then wanted to create a space for children to speak about some of the difficulties they may be experiencing in their lives, but in ways that would not be re traumatizing.
[00:47:47] We hoped to find ways that they could collectively speak about some of these experiences.
[00:47:53] We also hoped that we might be able to acknowledge the effects of abuse and harm on their lives.
[00:48:01] We planned to make it clear that children are never to blame for this abuse, and importantly, we hoped that we might be able to unearth and acknowledge some of the skills and knowledges that children demonstrate in trying to respond to the hazards in their lives.
[00:48:21] Through this conversation, we hope that individual children might feel more able to speak with us or each other about experiences in their lives and also that their own skills and knowledges would be more visible to them.
[00:48:40] We assembled together again as a group to resume our conversation about trees in the forest. In this part of the exercise, I wanted to draw the children's attention to the hazards that trees and forests sometimes face, as well as to talk about the effects of these hazards on trees and forests. I started this part of the discussion by saying, we have lovely trees which have strong roots, beautiful leaves and fruits.
[00:49:11] As beautiful as our trees and forests are, can we say that we are free from danger? The children quickly responded with a chorus of no.
[00:49:24] I then invited the group to mention some of the potential dangers that beautiful trees experience.
[00:49:31] They mentioned the following potential burning of trees, cutting trees down, weeing or urinating on trees, kicking Trees, too much rain, lightning, aging trees can get old and die and having no water.
[00:49:55] This conversation on the hazards faced by trees allowed a safe entry point into a discussion about children and the dangers and problems that they face in life.
[00:50:07] We have likened our lives to those beautiful trees in a forest.
[00:50:14] Would we be right to say that like trees and forests, children also face dangers and troubles in their lives?
[00:50:24] Collectively, the children responded with a loud yes.
[00:50:29] We then spent some time naming the problems and dangers that children experience.
[00:50:36] These included rape, being abused, abandoned, swearing at children, neglect, denying food, chasing children away from home, keeping children in teens, kidnapping, killing, eating children, children living on the streets, children smoking glue, children having to sell their bodies for sexual, children, not listening to their parents and caregivers.
[00:51:09] We then discuss at some length the effects of such hazards on children's lives.
[00:51:16] The children spoke about sadness, physical hurt and harm. They spoke of fear and being troubled in one's heart.
[00:51:26] Throughout this discussion, I was amazed by how the children were able to to name all these problems and their effects with seemingly no shame or any sense of being defined by them.
[00:51:38] The children were single voiced. They stood in solidarity as they gave voice to the bad things that people do to innocent children.
[00:51:49] Surprisingly, the energy and enthusiasm that they started the meeting with was still present even as we spoke about these hazards.
[00:52:00] This was despite the fact that it was very clear some of the children were speaking from direct experience of some of the mentioned hazards.
[00:52:11] An 11 year old boy heading a household and taking care of his seven year old brother particularly mentioned that children are sometimes chased out of their homes by relatives to leave on the streets.
[00:52:27] How children respond to Storms of Life Having come to a point where the storms of life had been named and the effects of these had been thoroughly traced, we then spoke about whether or not it was children's fault that such things happened to them.
[00:52:49] Again, there was solidarity in the children's response as they shouted out no.
[00:52:57] I then asked the children, I wonder what children do when these problems and storms come into their lives.
[00:53:06] Are there ways that they respond?
[00:53:10] Are there things that they can do?
[00:53:13] If there are, I would love to know what kind of things they do or can do.
[00:53:21] A whole lot of hands went up as children were burning to share their knowledge about what children can do in response to the storms of life.
[00:53:32] As I listened to different children, the knowledges that they have around protecting themselves became clearer. They spoke of the ways that they share problems with caring adults and friends.
[00:53:47] They also spoke about a range of initiatives that children can take to protect themselves.
[00:53:56] Talk to someone they trust Talk to their neighbour Run away to protect yourself.
[00:54:04] Talk to their teacher Pray about the problem, Ask for help Talk to a social worker Make a report to the police Talk to a friend Talk to Aunt D, one of the counsellors present.
[00:54:22] Talk to your friends about the problems.
[00:54:26] As the children made these different suggestions, everyone was listening intently.
[00:54:33] It was as if special knowledge had that might one day be very important was being exchanged.
[00:54:40] In future discussions, I will also be interested to ask how children hold on to their dreams and visions for their lives during storms.
[00:54:52] I suspect they would also have a lot to say about this in this instance. We then tend to focus on three questions.
[00:55:03] Are storms always present in our lives?
[00:55:06] Are our lives sometimes free of storms?
[00:55:11] What do you do when the storms have passed?
[00:55:15] I divided the children into groups of five so that they could spend time reflecting on these questions.
[00:55:23] As I went round the groups, I heard the children talk about the joyful times that they spent with their friends and at school.
[00:55:32] There was a general agreement within the larger group that storms come and go.
[00:55:38] I asked the children to include in their conversations stories about people who make them happy and who offer them support. I also asked the children to talk about how they contribute to other people's happiness.
[00:55:53] Walking around the room, I had the sense that the children were enjoying and valuing their conversations with each other.
[00:56:02] Part 4 certificates and song Whilst I'd been talking with the children about when the storms come, the community councillors had been busy preparing certificates for the children.
[00:56:16] They had taken notes about what the children had said during the Tree of Life exercise about their hopes, their dreams and their skills and these had all been recorded on specially made individual certificates.
[00:56:33] These certificates also honored the contribution of the special people in the children's lives.
[00:56:42] In this final part of the day, we invited a range of workers from within Jabavu Clinic to witness the certificate giving ceremony.
[00:56:52] While the conversations during the day had been wonderful, the certificates can be said to have been icing on the cake. The children were extremely excited and couldn't wait to show them off with pride to friends and family.
[00:57:10] Tandiwe, one of the girls in the group, was covered in smiles as she expressed that she would hang a certificate on the wall of her family lounge. It would be a reminder to her that she has a lot to live for in life.
[00:57:29] Writing a letter to caregivers Prior to this day with the children, the counsellors and I had spent some time talking about the challenges that we experience with regards to involving parents and communities in work with children.
[00:57:49] There is often a huge gap between what children experience during support groups and the context they return to in their homes and communities.
[00:58:01] It can be a great challenge to work out how to respond when children are returning to situations in which there is a high risk of abuse.
[00:58:11] It can also be a challenge to ensure that the work that we do with children does not alienate them in any way from loving families and relatives.
[00:58:22] We wish to find ways of including and involving caregivers in our work and, where possible, to extend our support and to children's families.
[00:58:34] We spent some time thinking through how we could enable children to share the experience of the Tree of Life exercise with their caregivers and families.
[00:58:45] We decided that perhaps giving children an opportunity at the end of the day to write a letter to their caregivers about the experience of the Tree of Life exercise might create an opportunity for for the children to speak about what they value in their lives in the context of their families.
[00:59:05] We also thought it might be a way that the children would acknowledge and appreciate the support that they have received from their caregivers in ways that would be sustaining of them.
[00:59:18] We ask children to identify who would be the person who demonstrates care to them that they would like to write to.
[00:59:27] We then encouraged children to include in their letters descriptions of their values, skills, hopes and dreams that they'd spoken about during the day.
[00:59:38] We also encourage them to acknowledge the contributions of the caregiver in their life and to extend an invitation to the caregiver to visit the support group when they had time to do so. As many of these children's caregivers would not be able to read, we mentioned to the children that it would be respectful and helpful if they could read their letters aloud to their caregivers.
[01:00:07] Kennedy gave me permission to share the letter he wrote to his grandmother.
[01:00:14] Dear Gogo, RA Ready Today I did a very nice thing.
[01:00:21] It was called the Tree of Life.
[01:00:23] In the tree I said I want to grow up to be a mechanic.
[01:00:29] You know that I like fixing things.
[01:00:31] Like that day on Monday I fixed the TV when it was not working.
[01:00:38] If I am a mechanic I will be like my father because he used to fix lights.
[01:00:47] Gogo, I want to grow up and be strong so that I can take care of you and Sandile.
[01:00:54] Gogo, thank you for the new uniform that you bought for me and the nice things you get for us. Always you are good and special.
[01:01:06] I invite you to support group from Kennedy Tree of Life Song we had planned to end the day by singing a special Tree of Life song, but unfortunately the day for the meeting arrived before we had a chance to come up with the song.
[01:01:26] The children, however, were quick to come to the rescue. They suggested that we all sing a special song that they all knew in order to end the day on a high note.
[01:01:41] Conclusion Embarking on this process of reworking the Tree of Life exercise has been a very positive experience for me.
[01:01:50] It has provided an opportunity to practically apply narrative ideas into my work with vulnerable children.
[01:01:59] I have now begun to look at the other tools and exercises that we have been working to facilitate conversations with children and communities and to consider how these can be made safer and more focused on second story development.
[01:02:18] As I conclude this paper, I have a major sense of being transported significantly as a counselor and trainer.
[01:02:28] It seems appropriate to end this paper with the words of a group of early childhood and education practitioners who have experienced the revised Tree of Life exercise and who will now be using this in their work.
[01:02:43] Their words seem to indicate that engaging with the revised Tree of Life exercise might also be of value to adults.
[01:02:53] This was certainly the case for me.
[01:02:57] Here are their words we are often looking at our lives from the negative side.
[01:03:04] It feels good when we can see ourselves from a different perspective, from a more positive point of view.
[01:03:13] Our last experience with the original Tree of Life exercise was very emotional. It felt like we had opened old wounds that we did not adequately address.
[01:03:24] This did not occur this time around.
[01:03:28] Having a sense of hope for the future enables you to look forward to living each day.
[01:03:36] It is not often that we get an opportunity to appreciate our skills and competences and to openly speak of them within the group.
[01:03:48] Clarity of one's hopes and dreams helps you to have a sense of where you are going in life and why you do the things that you do.
[01:03:58] There are many people who have done a lot for us in our lives, but sometimes we forget this and we rarely acknowledge them. From this experience, I look forward to going back home and acknowledging certain individuals before it is too late.
[01:04:17] I prefer this version of the Tree of Life to the original version that we had been using with children and communities.
[01:04:25] In this revised version, there is likely to be less crying and limited risk in opening wounds that we cannot help to heal. When children's circumstances are not easy, it cannot be morning and morning all the day.
[01:04:41] Children need a chance to celebrate life.
[01:05:05] Thank you for listening to this podcast from International Journal of Narrative Therapy and Community Work, published by Dulwich Centre Foundation. More about this recording and a treasure trove of articles, videos and multimedia works are available from narrativetherapyjournal.org. it's all free to access and share with no login required.
[01:05:24] Dulwich Centre is located on the land of the Kaurna people. We acknowledge the traditional owners of country and pay respect to elders past and present.
